Miranda Kenneally

Mexican Food Cures Writer's Block

Archive for October, 2009

New All-Time Lows

I’ve been rather busy at work lately, and it’s been showing in my personal life. For instance, I can’t seem to get enough high calorie foods in me. My body is craving only sugar and fat these days. It’s disgusting. But here’s where the real sadness lies:

1. I show up at a meeting to give a presentation to at least 100 people. When I show up, of course the projector isn’t hooked up (even though I put in an AV request), so I have to run around like an idiot calling people to come hook it up. Normally I’d just do it myself, but this auditorium had tons of little bells and whistles in the control room, and I didn’t want to mess anything up in our state-of-the-art international auditorium that is wired for simultaneous interpretation in 10 languages. So finally the AV lady shows up, she takes me aside and says, “Do you know you’re wearing two different shoes?”

I look down, and sure enough, I am wearing two TOTALLY different shoes. One has a gold buckle and is made of leather. The other has silver buckle and is made of shiny plastic shit. I had about two minutes before my presentation began to run back to the office and find matching shoes.

2. In order to catch up on email, I’ve taken to reading my email on blackberry while I’m using the bathroom. I find it’s quieter in there, the phone isn’t ringing and no one is stopping by. I also take a few trips to get soda throughout the day. During this time, I also blackberry constantly so I can get caught up. What’s sad? I could just buy a 12-pack of soda and keep it under the desk, but I need the soda-buying time to get some exercise and some sun, all while keeping up with email.

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Made in China

At a meeting at work:

Me: We need to look at buying gifts for the Chinese delegates. How about some leather portfolios with the conference title engraved on them?

Coworker from another office: We can get leather portfolios, but they were actually probably made in China. But when we engrave them, we’ll engrave them with the inscription “Made in America.” (in all seriousness)

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